Most people think they’re stuck because they're not quite "there" yet.

They’re not confident enough yet.
They’re not healed enough yet.
They’re not successful enough yet.

But what if the real reason you feel stuck has nothing to do with any of that… and everything to do with how you unconsciously learnt to survive?

For years, I thought the problem was me.

The overthinking.
The people-pleasing.
The need to perform.

I genuinely believed I just needed to work harder on myself (more therapy, more tools, more books, more growth)... then I’d finally feel free.

But here’s the truth I wish I had learned sooner:

Thinking there’s a place to get to is the very thing that keeps you trapped.

Back in 2018 when I had my first panic attack in the Uber office toilets, my mind said:

“See? You’re too weak. Too sensitive. Not cut out for this.”

But looking back, nothing about that moment was weakness.

It was a mirror, a reflection of how much I’d abandoned myself.

Because I was never broken.
I was just conditioned.

Conditioned to believe that worth is something you earn.
That love arrives when you perform well enough.
That success is the only way to finally feel safe.

And so even after leaving corporate, even after healing, even after doing the “inner work,” I still chased freedom like it was something outside myself.

Yet the moment you start searching for inner freedom…you’ve already lost it.

Inner freedom isn’t something you find.

It’s something that emerges when you stop trying to fix who you are.

Because the more you try to “fix yourself,” the more you reinforce the belief that you’re broken.

True freedom begins the moment you stop arguing with who you are right now.

Not because you’re giving up.
Not because you’re settling.

But because you finally realise that the version of you in this moment is not a problem to solve… it’s the proof that you survived.

And when you stop fighting the past, you stop fighting yourself.

That’s the moment something softer can finally find you:
Not perfection.
But peace.

Much love,
Alex
​

P.S. What I’m reading: The Seven Sisters - Lucinda Riley
​What I’m watching: Frankenstein
​Quote of the week: “None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.” - Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe

​
​

​

​

​

​
​